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Anjaana Anjaani: A double-barrelled bore!

Posted: October 2nd, 2010 | Author: | Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , | No Comments »

Comparisons are usually odious…pardon me for starting a review with what some of you may deem to be my favorite line! But, I guess comparisons are a natural instinct amongst the perfect samples of the human species so, avoiding it completely can be rather difficult. So,  I just could not refrain from comparing director Siddharth Anand’s journey across Tinsel Town thus far. Having done so, I admit that it tempted me to write a paper disproving Charles Darwin’s Theory of Evolution.

What a waste of talent?

His first movie was ripped off from Nine Months as Salaam Namaste and was probably his best. The next two – “Tara Rum Pum” and “Bachna Ae Haseeno” – made under a three-film contract with Yashraj Films, showed signs of intellectual regression that cost YRF a lot in terms of cash and credibility.  And his latest offering, the mindless and utterly soul-less “Anjaana Anjaani”, is likely to blow a big hole into Messrs Nadiadwala and Grandsons!!

The movie is a collage of events without a narrative string with far too many songs further diluting things further. The story itself oscillates between a wannabe yuppie comedy to an ode to romance that brings together a made-for-each-other couple Akash (Ranbir) and Keira (Priyanka) on Brooklyn bridge in New York as they muster courage to end their lives. Sadly, for the director and his viewers the movie ends up as a half-baked attempt, thanks to Anand’s obvious indecision about its genre.

The five reasons to watch the film:

  1. If you have never been to the United States, especially to the great deserts and rocky Midwest, check out some breathtaking visuals as this crazy couple drive Keira’s red car of dubious vintage that goes under a wacky name of Blush.
  2. The movie is a must for all Ranbir Kapoor fans, as the actor not only drops his shirt a few times but almost loses his trousers too in a sequence when he dances at a gay bar and actually gets “picked up” by a burly Midwesterner.
  3. Post her National Award, Priyanka seems a more confident actor and easily comes out with the best performance in what is otherwise quite a drab affair, save for a few punches incorporated in a largely scattered manner.
  4. The basic premise of two people reaching a suicide pact leads to some crackle in the first half. But the director’s inability to weave a story around it starts to make things insufferable in the second, almost sending his viewers to suicide point.
  5. To be honest, I cannot find a fifth reason to watch the film and shall therefore go with its short duration of 150 minutes. We need to probably thank him for taking pity on our senses and ending our ordeal sooner than planned.

The five reasons to avoid the film:

  1. We have two spontaneous actors in the movie but somehow the chemistry is conspicuous by its absence. Or maybe, I’m comparing on-screen sizzle of these two actors with other co-stars. Think Katrina-Ranbir or Shahid-Priyanka and this couple appear colder than the Arctic Circle.
  2. Somebody needs to help Priyanka make better movie choices. She seems to be getting a kick out of choosing utterly mindless characters in her movies. Honestly, why would anyone want to act in movies like “What’s Your Rashee” or “Pyaar Impossible”? Her Keira is pretty much in the same class as her Alisha in Pyaar Impossible. Pretty much IMPOSSIBLE.
  3. The two characters hardly seem to contain any flesh and blood characteristics. Not once during their 20-day suicide pact do they hark back to the reasons that made them decide on the extreme step. Of course, Keira does attempt to break the pact by trying an early exit but is saved by her friend.
  4. There is too much of license that Anand takes with the script. For e.g., the duo indulge in some expensive last wishes but we’re never told who paid for it. Akash fleetingly robs his own house that’s been taken over by a bank for non-payment of mortgage, but would that suffice to hire boat rides into the Atlantic? Come to think of it, we don’t even know what Keira, who is from the San Francisco, is doing in New York.
  5. Of course, if the director was looking to make a serious film on suicides, the reasons for the duo deciding on ending their lives  is by far the flimsiest seen on screen. Of course, one tends to empathize with Priyanka as she is paired opposite the wooden as ever Zayed Khan, before she lands up on the Brooklyn Bridge. As for our hero, who has lost all in the stock bust, all it takes to change his mind is a two-minute tryst with a doctor (Tanvi Azmi in a blink-and-miss role) who waxes eloquent about suicides.

My Verdict: Anjaana and Anjaani should have been allowed to jump off the Brooklyn Bridge in the first frame itself. It would have saved the actors and audience so much trouble. And if Siddharth Anand fails to deliver the goods soon, he too may have to take the plunge off the Brooklyn Bridge!

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